TSA Accidently Hires Danny Ocean

It's the TSA's best of the best of the best at it again. Per the Full Story below a SeaTac TSA agent has admitted to lifting $20k worth of passengers jewelry from their luggage.
Just like Ocean's Eleven!
Except, probably without the George Clooney looks, or the cleverly orchestrated heist plan, or the highly trained team of accomplices, or the high tech gadgetry, or the casino setting.
Ok... so it's more like the guy who steals your hubcaps while you are stopped at a traffic light- only he's employed by the government.

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EWR TSA Has a Lost & Found?

Who knew? If only the TSA's lost & found wasn't run by the TSA, people might have a chance of being reunited with their property. Like so many other things that the TSA is responsible for, they can only deliver on half of the mandate implied by 'lost & found'. In the Full Story below, we learn of a TSA employee working in the office serving Newark International. Another fine example of the TSA's best of the best of the best, this employee has been arrested for stealing a laptop from the lost and found and trying to sell it.
Lost & what was the other part of that again?

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TSA Starts a Shopping Club

The Norfolk International Airport TSA has started a members only shopping club. Just like Costco, there is membership card- called a security ID badge. Just like a wearing a wife beater to Walmart, there is a uniform- blue shirts and badges. And just like a big box store, the ORF TSA has a retail outlet- called the airport. Unlike any other big box shopping club though, you don't have go and retrieve your own items. Personal shoppers- called 'passengers' bring the merchandise to you. Granted most of it is crap- hairdryers, magazines, clothes not in your size, etc. But every once in a while a real gem comes by. When you belong to the Norfolk International Airport TSA shopping club and a personal shopper/passenger brings you something you want- such as a $24,000 Rolex- just take it.
As the Full Story below describes- membership has it's privileges.
No, not really. We here at TSAFail made that part up. Not the part about the ORF TSA taking a $24,000 Rolex, just the part about a shopping club. There is no club... just more theft by the TSA's best of the best of the best.
Considering that the starting salary for a TSA screener is $23,400, it is probably safe to assume that any screener wearing a $24,000 watch has joined the TSA shopping club.

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EWR TSA Security Screening like a Roach Motel for Passenger Valuables

Oh TSA HR- once again you have left the mensa debate team short a member, as you continue to hire the best of the best of the best. Today's TSA criminal is courtesy of the Newark International Airport. Stealing from little old ladies is bad enough, claiming that you 'found' the stolen goods is just plain dumb. Doing it while being recorded on video is absolutely, positively... something one would expect from the TSA.
EWR TSA screening... valuables check in... they don't check out.

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TSA Full Body Package Scan Ends in Tears

Being the TSA, it also includes a hostile workplace, an assault and an arrest to complete the trifecta of fail. In the Full Story below we learn of a Miami International TSA Officer in a training class with the new advanced imaging technology systems (AIT)- also know as the full body scanner. As he is virtually strip searched in front of his colleagues, this MIA TSA Officer becomes the butt of his supervisors jokes about the size of his manhood. Does he:
1) Hang his head in embarrassment?
2) Respond about always having to check his package because it's too large for carry-on?
3) Or.... wait for the end of the day, attack the joker with a baton in the parking lot, making him beg for forgiveness on his knees.
Did you pick door number three? Can you help the TSA could figure out why their TSO's have a public image of being insecure people on a powertrip?
Don't miss the Full Story below for mugshot goodness with a TSA uniform.

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'Cause When You Work for the TSA- Free Pizza is a Perk!

Oh, TSA HR department, where do you keep finding the best of the best of the best?
Today at TSAFail, we bring you another TSA Officer doing something they will be arrested for. This time, it is a TSA Officer from the Wayne County Airport in Detroit. Good job DTW TSA, that's two staff members arrested in less than a month.
The Full Story below has a Detroit TSA Officer and her boyfriend rolling into a Mobile station to purchase (more?) alcohol. A TSA badge is flashed in lieu of payment for pizza, punches are thrown and a getaway is made. Or would be made if the TSA Officer hadn't paid for the alcohol with her credit card.
This truly has to be a new low in the TSA's 'illegal hobbies outside of work'. This makes the air marshal raping an escort look well thought out or... it makes the TSA's burger joint bandit look like Danny Ocean.

Did we mention that there is video? No? There is video.

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How to Spot a TSA Air Marshal...

Badge- check.
Gun- check.
Shaved genitals- ummm... check??
Raping an escort- What?!!
It's the TSA's best of the best of the best hard at work again. The mind boggles just contemplating the sort of tests the TSA actually conducts on fresh hires who are given guns and badges and put on airplanes to protect the flying public. It is clear from the Full Story below that this air marshal, staying in a hotel outside of SeaTac, had some sort of training. He claims to have known enough not to use a firearm after drinking alcohol. Although the coercion, rape and theft are all clearly ok.
The TSA has fired this particular air marshal, which obviously leaves a vacancy in the program.
No word yet on whether the TSA plans to fill the vacancy with the ShamWow spokesman.

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When You Work for the TSA- It's What You Crave

If you are thinking White Castle, you are half right. If you are thinking airport screening by day and robbing White Castle by night, then award yourself a full point. Once again the crack HR department of the TSA has found the best of the best of the best to keep the traveling public safe. It isn't yet clear which airport the fast food bandit is stationed at, although DFW seems likely. After being arrested for knocking over a White Castle, a McDonalds and being a suspect in 5 other holdups, the TSA notes (in the Full Story below) that "The individual has been removed from screening passengers and property". Good to know, since his sitting in a holding cell would otherwise lead to a conspicuous absense at a security checkpoint
For extra fun, take a look at the mugshots of the suspect and his accomplices in the Full Story below and see if you can guess which one is the TSA Officer. If you picked the guy striking the gangsta pose, award yourself another point.

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