EWR TSA- "That's Not a Knife..."

Has the Newark International Airport hired Crocodile Dundee as a screener? What reason, other than a gross misconception regarding what size of blade qualifies as a knife, could explain how a serrated folding knife went through an airport checkpoint unnoticed? Do read the Full Story below to see TSA spokesperson Ann Davis describe how the TSA screener who missed the knife will receive remedial training.
Remedial?
If a TSA screener is missing knives that go through their checkpoint, they don't need remedial training they need training. This is what happens when the qualifications for being a TSA screener consist of 'must like pizza'. The Full Story below also notes how on the same day as the knife incident at Newark Liberty, TSA officers detected and removed a smoke bomb from a passenger's luggage. A 5" long smokebomb in the shape of a stick of dynamite with 'mammoth smoke' written on the side of it in brightly colored letters.
Next time Wile E. Coyote should just pack a knife.

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Littlerock TSA- Procedurally Dyslexic

The LIT TSA knows what their job is. They prevent passengers from taking dangerous or prohibited items on board aircraft. Unfortunately, they just have a bit of trouble getting the order of things correct. As we learn in the Full Story below it was the Little Rock Arkansas TSA who closed the barn door once the cow left, by phoning ahead to Bush Airport in Texas and asking if the passengers on a flight departing LIT could be screened for weapons on arrival.
LIT TSA- putting the cart before the horse... putting on their shoes before their pants... putting the Fail in TSAFail.

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TSA Success... Whaaaaaat?!!?

No, TSAFail is not being broadcast from the Bizarro World. The Full Story below outlines how the TSA at Luis Muñoz Marín International in San Juan Puerto Rico actually got it right. They stopped someone with things he shouldn't have had. This was not the typical TSAFail of passengers being stopped for carrying water or honey or applesauce or play-doh or flashcards or leg braces or any one of a hundred other ridiculous things. Not this time... this time the TSA stopped dangerous things. This time, with one passenger, they caught:
-a stun gun
-a pepper spray canister
-four box cutters
-a switch blade knife
-two lighters
-a button device attached to a wire that gives a charge when pressed
-scissors
and
-three boxes of matches
Now we know what it takes to get the attention of the ever vigilant TSA screeners.

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Failback Position: Water or Bomb Parts?

It's time again for the Failback Position. This is the TSAFail feature that brings you classic fails from the past to enjoy alongside the ongoing fails of today. Think of it as a tidbit of fetid stilton to be savored with a bottomless pack of Kraft singles.
Today's Failback Position dates back to 2007 and takes place in the Albany International Airport. It was at that time that the TSA's own inspectors tested TSA field officers by trying to sneak prohibited items through airport checkpoints. See how you would fare in such a test by comparing your skills with those of the TSA. Type a, b or c in answer to the question below, which is based on a real life situation described in the Full Story...
A piece of carry-on luggage is going through a screening checkpoint and contains, amongst the usual items, a bottle of water and bomb parts. Do you:
a) confiscate the bag for containing bomb parts then alert the airport police?
b) confiscate the bag for containing bomb parts AND water then alert the airport police?
c) confiscate the water and let the bag through with the bomb parts?
Do not forget, that a TSA keyboard has only one key and it is 'c'.


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Bullets Got Through A Checkpoint? Don't Worry the TSA has Tivo

How to you get bullets onto an airplane? Easy, go through the Will Rogers World Airport in Oklahoma. In the Full Story below we learn of a passenger who accidentally did just that. The ever vigilant TSA Officers manning the x-ray machine at OKC didn't notice the clip of bullets going by on their screens. The supervisor reviewing the recorded xray images 30 minutes later, did. Three flights that the bullets might have ended up on were tracked down and searched upon landing... as this clearly wasn't a problem until the planes were back on the ground. No word if the supervisor could have found the bullets in the recorded images in 22 minutes if he fast forwarded through the commercials.

That's a lot of TSAFail, but today is a twofer. A TSA spokesperson at the end of the Full Story below reminds passengers to carefully check their bags before heading to the airport. The TSA intercepted 14 passengers who accidentally brought guns to the nations airports last week alone. Anyone care to guess how many others went through undetected?
For the TSA, preventing prohibited items from getting onto an airplane involves passengers not bringing prohibited items onto an airplane.

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